July 30, 1998 Thursday
The night had for the most part come and gone this morning. My alarm went off at 8:00, and I wisely hit the snooze–or unwisely, now the knowing the result of my extended sleep. No, I wasn’t late for class. I had a dream:
The summer session was almost over, with only two more days remaining. As I walk to class, Sidney had arrived just a second earlier, and is sitting down in the back right corner. I think to myself that I haven’t seen her almost the entire summer session–at least out of this class. I go back to where she is sitting and take a seat next to her. I say that I haven’t seen her much, and she says she has been very busy. “I understand,” I think to myself. “So,” I say, “what floor are you on?” “The fifth floor,” she replies, and as my mind registers that, she pulls out a pack of cigarettes.
“Maybe we could get something to eat,” I suggest. She gives me a look, so I quickly add, “Just for something to do after class, I mean.” She really isn’t for that, and I try to convince her until I realize the class has stopped and all are now turned to watch our little drama play out. I apologize to the professor, and the class resumes. When it is finally over I try again.
“I’ve kept to myself this summer,” she tells me, “to avoid any situations like this.” Seeing she is about to leave, I motion to her.
“Before you go,” I begin, “I want to tell you how much I lo-” and then stop, just as she winces. “Alright, alright. no L-word. I want you to know what you mean to me, and how wonderful you are. In the last year I still remember those key parts.” I continue to talk, and when I was finished I braced myself for her storming out of the room. She didn’t. She looked at me and said, “Let’s go.”
Speechless, I go with her. We go into her room, and she packs I talk about the last twelve months. The entire time I’m thinking, “It happened!”
I ride shotgun in the Audi as we drive to Elmwood at night. Sidney’s telling me about her last year. We come to Sweetwater Park in Elmwood, but I continuous flow of trains won’t allow us to reach the other side of the tracks. I get to the other side by finding another way across, but in the process I lose track of the Audi. I continue on to my house, which is just a few hundred yards away.
When I arrive, I find all the Connor family members from my mom’s side are there, and I ask where Sidney is. They tell me, “Air Force One,” so I think, “Yeah, she’s on Air Force One…sure.”
Then I see it, Air Force One, in my backyard. I go out to it and climb the stairs leading to the plane. There are a lot of people in it. To the right a woman is coming out of a compartment, and everyone murmurs, “Look, the president!” I see a pale blonde head sitting in a seat not far away, facing away from me, near the compartment the older woman had just exited from. And as I near Sidney I think, “So what, it’s only the president.”
One commentary on my dream: I wish my mind would shut up!