April 24, 1999 Saturday
A side note. Went to the Delta Tau Delta house last night around two. Julie had her sister and cousin down from Chicago for the weekend, and I promised I would see her there. Julie and I are still friends and everything, so there’s so problem. Well, I arrive and the three are already inside. The guys in the house were checking out Julie’s company, the two perhaps being the most attractive in the room. Yet Julie was not going to go around to each person and announce they were in high school. No point in that, I guess.
Anyway, her cousin, Ann, started talking to me. When someone usually uses the “word” they mean just that, the use of the mouth, lips, and tongue, along with air to create sounds that when strung together create socially agreed upon noises, the purpose of all of this being the conveying of important messages from one human being to another. Yet there is no definition in Webster’s to describe her flowing, rata-tat-tat speech patterns. She talked! She talked so fast and constantly I could not keep up with the strangled story loops of narration. I tried my best to best to the conversation when I could, but I only wedged in about 5% of the time. I could tell she was intelligent and worldly for her age (under house arrest during the winter and can’t leave the state of Illinois, yet she wants to go to balmy California and be an actress. Yet she showed her age. Also, she is a kleptomaniac. I watched her try to take an orange road sign, and had her eye on the Delt’s waffle iron. Still, a nice kid, don’t get me wrong.
So the night went on, and she asked if we could go outside to talk because of the blaring music in the house. Outside on the porch were two chairs. We were two people–perfect! So I setttled down into the plastic chair on the right. Ann said her chair was wet. I offered to dry her chair off, but she replied we could both just sit in my chair. It was a small chair. So, there I was, my arm around a sixteen year old because said chair could barely contain us, and she’s talking 100 mph. Actually, it was pretty interesting, and we talked (or at least I listened) about religion, philosophy and such. I found myself enjoying it because so rarely does anything on a college campus speak of such things (you’d be surprised).
Then Julie finally came out for a while, and I don’t know what she thought, but I’d see her side of it, whatever it is. What a strange night. It was obvious that every guy how walked past was jealous, but that’s not the big thing for me either. Ann said she picks someone out of a crowd to talk to and then discusses everything with them, and she said it had been easy and obvious to pick me to have an enlightened conversation with.
That is yet another thing that has been on my mind, and I’m happy to get some surprise feedback. Even though I am working out, running, wearing the clothes and doing the hair thing–even trying a self tanner a few weeks ago that should never be sold to pale Swedes–sometimes I wonder if I am actually shooting myself in the foot. 1) How will a unique girl be able to notice another unique individual when he looks just like most of the guys around? 2) Will they just like me for my appearance perhaps, and not care about everything inside?
Ann helped me, in a very odd, winding way, have better faith in the female population, and a free spirit such as hers was a great inspiration for a few lines. The result was “Slow Down Ann.”
The light in her eyes beg for both the pan and fire
Ready to burnout before her first drive
Unlock the key and it’s hello stars and open road
So that’s what it’s like to match the whirling wits of a tornado
Before you find yourself swaying from a wire
Better undo your knots and smooth your folds
The winds have blown all the petals off your rose
It’s nothing that can be tamed, this hunger for the edge
Speaking with zeal of miracle cures that heal
I should leave but only draws me into her webs
Stealing time and what’s not nailed down to the ceiling
My advice is take off like a heat-seeker to the nearest pew
Slow down Ann, the world can’t keep up with you
Slow down Ann, there’s miles between false and true
Lights from her eyes set her off and she’s gone, she’s gone